i got my one week break and it was fun seeing my uncle jeff , went to aunt's house to taste her cooking and going sentosa with leonard . Tml i will start work again , yup another 18more days , before i am able to finally go out with everyone . simply miss out the fun , the sunshine , n everything . sorry my fren i had been neglecting u all , dun scold me oke . sorry lp.


"CIN U MUST GAMBATTE , A FEW MORE DAYS LEFT ..."


i wanan to go MOS with lp , cin and the rest

roasshow fever till 15th june okie :>

gambatte !

reis n leonard Always

Someday

I had been wondering about life , how had life begins and when will it ends

fragility ? vitality ? I guess i had been "missing" something in my life till i meet this person

had that been great?

yup...probably someone said " u will know it when u meet."

"There was the big problem with loving someone. There were lots of other people that you could love, if the timing was right, and if you got the chance, and if you were not already promised to someone else. It all just seemed so random."– Stories We Could Tell, Tony Parsons

if i could have a life like this , where is love ? where had relationships come when u are afraid to hurt the person you loved . The best remedy is "never "

and somehow human seem to desire more

when they realise one day they will unknowingly hurt that SOMEBODY

that is when how late ?

that is when we fail to realise what that SOMEBODY had done for us

to think i had such a intention

i just stop myself

those silent screams beneath

gal ...what are u doing ?

gambatte always !!!

reis n leo

future ?

I had been pondering about the recent events ...

my mum suddenly said she will give me allowance once i started school ?

my dearie talked to me about "US"

currently having my one-week break from the roadshow , just plainly tired and i wish to slack .

to-do list :

1. hair cut
2. borrow some books for reading
3. meet-up with lp , catherine and peiwei
4. meet-up with uncle zhe
5. dinner with yen , kaini and joyce
6. get a pair of jeans - budget below $50 + tee ?
7. JJ concert in june with dearie
8. Zoo day with my nephew yuen zhang
9. Karen;s camara + Roger 's psp :>


for a moment i am feeling happy recently cos i ended my lucky plaza roadshow , made a few nice friends like joyce , sharon , alex , jimmy , ah bin , farhanz , louis , KC . just acc leonard to see the doctor , i know he is feeling down , been trying to cheer him up .

" Love is such a potent , it made u lose your sane "

reis always love leonard

stalemate ?

been feeling down these few days , i don;t know why . my mood swings had worsen and all i know is i had been sneezing one whole day at work , have the flu bug caught me ? Probably i am tired from work ... but that was money i need . Received another" bomb "today from CPf , repayment for poly school fee , i think i had to defer the payment first due to study . Life is like that , we simply can;t expect so much .

can someone lift up my spirit ? :<

I feel so sick....

all had become stalemate ...

regards ,
clarie

i dunno

Somehow when we dun live up to people's expectation , they can never understand what you are going through . I am tired , probably the roadshow had worn me down , i feel so tattered in my life . standing 12 hours a day is not easy . I had an internal struggle cos I lost my sense of touch , i lost my sense of humor and i lost my sense of feeling . At the end of the day all i could wish was crawling into my comfortable bed and i am contented . I knew how disappointed he was when he did tried to make an effort to accompany me for lunch and esp last night about that "feel" which i sound so cold . There is really something wrong on me cos i am cold-blooded esp after a hard toil at work , all i want is sleep. i am heavily deprived of sleep , i wish work could ended as soon as possible . Not that iw as not looking forward , but everyday meeting them is a challenge , i wonders how long can all these "masks" i use can last me .

All i could said is life is full of misery ... human are here to enjoy or suffer or even sustain that "time" . I wonder when had love become like this ? do i feel disappointments , anyway no one will care or understand . everyone is F***ing selfish in their own ways , I admit i was one too . I don;t want to let other feels as if i am on top of the world . Many times , i forgot my own identity as who ? Yup , indeed i was wrong for not sparing a thought for somebody . i kind of getting tired of everyone questioning me what the hell am i blogging about ? That is intelluctual ability , dube! interpret it yourself ,,gtg to rest . Just upset ... and tired . i hate "ya ".

Brandon

"happy 23rd b day to Brandon "

been busy since the last day of exam , 8th may 06 . seriously wish to take a break but work life will begin soon and yet there is no stopping other then middle of the month .

SONY Roadshow ( lucky plaza ) ------- may 12th ---21st
break .......may 22th -28th
SONY Roadshow ( People Park;s) ----- may 29th to June 15th
June 16th onward duty free

These few days , i went to alot of other places , bringing brandon around and my dearie is darn good to accompany me . I never expect i will such a nice guy and i will cherish him for now . Miss brandon's flight today cos i am over exhausted by tiredness , since 8th may i had sleep no more then 4hours and i am extremely tired when i reach home almost 12am every night and had to wake up at 8plus ... i need REST. Was touched today cos leon acc brandon to the airport to send him off at 5 am in the morning , cos he had to go to school later for morning class. I really don't know how to thank him for helping me this n that .

mon 8th may

Pm is finally over , took my assignment results , it reflect okie . Took a light nap and went to meet brandon . Cat , dennis and zhiwei took him out to play billard . Guess cat builled him again haha , she damm expert at that game . Meet them n adrian for dinner at lau pau sat . We ordered too many food till we cannot finish . Next , went to mind cafe to play games ... guess everyone was having a good time. Finally , dennis acc brandon to check out of his hostel cos zhiwei's invite brandon home to stay . Next morning brandon is suppose to meet his classmate and leon helped to bring his luggage home . i can;t imagine he carried the luggage around in np . one word to describe "good".

tue 9th may

Morning was work , distributing flyers for cindy at wisma /taka. Next,went out with brandon to ChinaTown , got him the famous lim zhi yuen BBQ meat and also buy medicinal oil for his mum n granny . finally he is able to go Cathay Cineplex and watch mission impossible 3 , it was exciting , thrilling and the sound system and effect is really good . Though tired, we are still able to watch it . After show , he went into a shopping spree to buy STUSSY shirts and lastly we had a nice dinner at pepperlunch . :Pit was fun , delicious and happy . There was something weird cos ther e is 5 of us ( me , leonard , brandon , angela , antony) . Do i sound like i am trapped btw the past and present . At that moment , i admit i was , nevertheless i still feel embracing the present is better and since then no regrets . Then lastly , brandon went to stay over at leon's house . that's why when i overslept ...... sad i din manage to send him off . Not sure how many years later are we going to meet again .:<

am i happier ?

been bored by studies stress , finally having the last paper . Some bad news ... i think i din do well for my hmt test cos precisely i kind of have some mental blocks whist doing , let hope god gimme some miracle . i am kind of busy for the exam , anyone who talked to me , i am going bonker at any rate .helps!!!!! one more day to go , hopefully , everything turns out alright .

was wondering about what consitute decisions? what consitute a relationship when happiness is built at the expense of other's pain ? do i owe anyone anything , was starting to feel immunity of another mess i created myself .

rest of the month ...may updates :

8th may 06 - pm tests 10-12.15pm + meet brandon for dinner
9th may 06 - working flyers distributor
10th may06 - meet classmate gathering , outing
11th may 06 - go aunt;s house n meet brother shopping ..hee
12th- 21st 06 - sony roadshow fever ----lucky plaza :>

finally settled Er , now left hmt and pm , one of my greatest fear i suppose . Went to bugis area , ( dunlop street) to help brandon reserve his accomdation for 3 days . Yup i finally manage to these stuffs , my hongkie fren coming very soon so gottent o fetch him . brandon !!! and leon accomany me to do this . today he fell sick but still accompany me , hope he faster recover !!! had a neoprint session with him , damm fun , i think like two big kids we are there drawing at the neoprint , even time limit was not enough ...haiz .. anyway , it was fun... heee ... must gambatte for two more papers :>

reis