everything is a mistake

My major event was yesterday . I was in charge of distributing the goodies bag and help out . It had been a wonderful and hectic day when I got to interact with most of colleagues. That was probably the only time we talk more than a few minutes .

I love the satisfaction this job bring me but the tiredness wasn't rewarding with the extra ot that I put in .

today , everyone in the office was tired and slack. We were feeling tired and I don't even feel like doing anything . this is probably my last week here . I was wondering that happy time are really short-lived . I dunno him , yup today is our anniversery but kind of I dun want to celebrate it .
We hasn't been on talking term much and more or less I kind of feel we drift apart . When two person are stubborn and refused to give in , it agravated the matter.

I probably admit i was wrong in the sense i kind of feel irritated by his friends. Almost every evening some magical phone call will be coming in to ask him out for a drink . Sat was actually our day but his friend called him and half of the day , 6pm onward he went out with them . I was unhappy , i probably snapped at him. But this is the 3rd sat that routine are repeating . I do agreed everyone should have some social life but somehow the planning wasn't quite right . yup , there are times i learn to sppreciate even though he went out with friends till wee hours of the night , the next morning he still keep his promise to go joggin with me .

When is the last time i seriously went for a day date? I simply cannot recall . Sometime when weekday i feel too tired , i was thining i can't be botner to go out during wkend . But when i was lazing at home during weekend , i kind of feel it is so boring . Going out freshened me up in some sense especially when i need to unwind . I haven went to the beach i wanted to go so much , i havent done alot of things i wanted to do .

I finally had enough , i had enough of arguement , i need a rest badly . when ppl had insufficient sleep , he or she will have a bad hair day and my tummy aches is still coming back . I had drink too much yakult till i feel like puking . He probably doesn't understand or ask me how am i been ? he simply just keep rattling at me and being defensive about his friends. Because i feel they were too "free" and keep arranging this n that. When is the last time i had a proper talk with him .dinner time were fast and sometime we just go home straight . when is the time i can have a good talk with him . I seriously lost touch of it .

I dun wannt to weep , i feel so depressed . anyway , i believe this wkend retail theraphy will helps . I dunno what i am doing . sch fee is haunting me again ............
and i need a shopping buddy ............

sometime i feel he just react too much and argue with me . Love can be so painful and tiring no matter how hard you try . he is still so selfish , when he is tired and stress i just give in , when he wanan to go out i just give in .



reis